Friday, October 10, 2008

The First Turn

The Ven. Shi Wuling has another great post. I encourage you to go read it. Here is a snippit to whet your appetite.

We often hear in Buddhism that we should never make an enemy. Additionally, we should turn enemies into friends.

Essentially, we need to turn, and this will be ever so slowly at first, the relationship around. It's the first turn that's the hardest. It starts with what we tell ourselves about the other person. We try to still the negative chatter and replace it with something positive. Also, we look for their suffering. We replace our frustrated, complaining thoughts with those that are empathetic and caring. Then we'll be ready.

During your next interaction with the person, look for something they do for you that you can label "kind." The kindness may very well not have come from a kind intention. The other person may have been thinking that you're so inept that she needs to do something for you or you'll mess it up! That's okay. What matters at this point is not the other person's intention, but rather how you choose to interpret their action and react to it. By choosing to focus on the kind act instead of the unkind intention, you have the opportunity to react out of kindness. And so you say a sincere thank you.


5 comments:

FranIAm said...

How fitting. I am really trying to deal with my anger and discontent and how hard it is to be reconciled.

This is beautiful, fitting and helpful for all.

Thank you and I always love the links to Ven. Shi Wuling.

Leonardo Ricardo said...

Oh, I´m not certain I have it in me...but, that´s been my challenge for a while...a quick question: Can I start to reform my negativity towards others after Sarah Palin in safetly tucked away back in Alaska? Would that be cutting corners with my soul?

Robert said...

I just don't know Leonardo. I so want to get rid of her here, I'm not so sure I want her back! :)

Leonardo Ricardo said...

Oh please take her back, it would be the kindest thing to do for the country...think of the larger picture for your fellow woman/man.

LOL

I´ll be nice, you don´t have to take her back...you can have her impeached for her reckless use of power that was noted yesterday.

Have a wonderful weekend,

abuddhistperspective said...

Let's try it from this perspective. ;-) Our thoughtful politicians are providing us with copious (I've been waiting a long time for the perfect time to use this one!) opportunities to practice letting go of animosity and dissolving enmities. Does that help?