Today is a very hard day for me. I had to drop Emma off at the social worker's office for her new family to pick her up. Even though we knew it was coming for a while now and even though I had been working on owning the pain and sadness leading up to today, it is still incredibly painful.
Emma has been such an amazing gift from God. Her departure leaves a void in my heart. I have been telling her how much she is loved and how she will be prayed for every day and now I have to trust her to God's care and keeping.
Strangely I don't feel pissed at God. I guess I have learned to not always try to figure out they "why" in everything that happens
But part of me wishes so much that God's care and keeping would have left her here. My heart is broken and my eyes are filled with tears. Letting go is such hard work.
Is this all there is
3 hours ago